I have to start out by telling you that writing this post was hard to write because I had to think deeply about situations that hurt me in my past and the label that I live under.
The Bad term is what I call the stigma and label that comes along with having dyslexia. When people heard that you has dyslexia they seem to start looking at you sideways. With that simple statement you have turned their view of you upside down. Before telling them this you where normal and just like them, and now there is something “wrong” with you, or at least different about you. And to make it worst the thing that is “wrong” is invisible, so it sneaks up on people. Like sharks, spiders, or things in the dark- think about it people hate the unknown. There are many signs of dyslexia, but no one can walk down the street and tell you if you have dyslexia. So it shocks people when they find out about it.
And on top of being invisible, dyslexia is hard to communicate to people in how it affects us. I have a really hard time to find words, or examples to tell to people, and I like words. It is hard to share the daily frustrations and failures that are a part of our lives and expect people to understand. It is not human nature to tell people about what are our failures are in life. Especially when we think that no one will understand.
The hard truth is that some people are going to make decisions about you when they hear you have dyslexia. Here is a personal example from my past. This took place in my third grade classroom during one of the open houses that year. The open house had been going for a while and most of the parents and kids were just visiting with each other. I overheard one of my “friends” telling their parents that I had dyslexia and that I went to special education everyday, which was all true and I was not ashamed of this. To me it was just a part of my life.
The next thing that I know my “friend’s” parents came over to a talk to me. They made small talk for a little bit, and then said, “I am so sorry to hear that you have dyslexia.” To which I think I replied with something like, “Umm, thank you.” I mean what do you say back to that? They went on to say something that forever changed my life- “And that the only job you will every get is as a Wal-mart Greeter.”
I was in the third grade when these people outlined my whole path in life. Their opinions were that having dyslexia was a death sentence for having a real job or being a productive member of society. Since that day I have done everything in my power not to believe that opinion of me because I don’t want those people to define my life. Ever.
I try not to think about what people have said about my life and what I would end up like, since most of them have been really, really off base. And the only way to show what I mean is to tell you about me. So the next post I will be writing will be my story. Be excited!
Also if there is anything you would like me to talk about please feel free to comment and ask me to write a piece about that topic.
Tool #3- I wish that this was a perfect world where labels and stigmas don’t exist, but we don’t live there. My honest opinion about people, who label you, is to not be friends, or hang out with them. Most people are a little scared about a person that have a challenge they don’t understand, and my response to that it talk about dyslexia- the good things about it and the challenging parts of it. Help people to understand what is going on in your brain and that you are just like them. Only your brain is different. I know it is hard, but people need to hear about what it is like to be us. We are a part of society and we have a lot of good to offer to this world. Never forget that.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
Terms- The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Let me start off by saying what you are about to read may upset you. Actually it may do more than just upset you. My hope is that it will at least make you think, examine, and maybe even change you thought patterns about dyslexia. I feel this is fair because as a dyslexic I have to do it all the time.
Also I need to place a disclaimer here. So my Disclaimer- these are MY opinions and observations about my dyslexia. No one is perfectly alike, so therefore I believe that not everyone’s dyslexia is perfectly alike either. Also the many tools that I am going to talk about are things and ideas that have helped me in my life. Some of them may help you, and some may not. I am really hoping to start a conversation and to try to help people who are like me.
So, anyhow, to move on- Terms, which is what I said I was going to talk about.
Let’s start with the Ugly- that’s me. Not physically, mind you… In reality I am actually really cute, but that is not the point. The point is I am a little (ok a lot) hostile to the words that are used everyday to describe dyslexia and in turn dyslexics. Really there are just 2 that most people use that I cannot stand.
*Dramatic Pause*And they are- Disability and Overcoming.
The word disability has a super negative connotation and definition- “a physical or mental handicap, especially one that prevents a person from living a full, normal life or from holding a gainful job.” So in other words- out look of life- not so good and may never be good. I feel that this word robs some of my ability to believe in my future and myself. So I try not to use this word and I go out of my way to avoid it when describing myself. I understand that dyslexia can be a disability and does affect people’s lives, but it is not the end of the world and has many positive things about it (more on that later).
So on to the next word- Overcoming. This is, to me, an over used word that most people would deploy in talking about “fixing” or “curing” dyslexia. I am just going to come right out and say it- there is no magic wand that fixes our brains with dyslexia. It is going to be in our brains for all of our lives and it is going to affect us. Some days it will affects us more then others. The word overcoming, to me, sends a message that there is someway to live where dyslexia does not impact everyday life. I have yet to find the magic formula and I doubt I will.
Let’s move on to the good part, or what I call replacing the ugly terms with more positive messaged words. I think that words are really important. They are the main way we communicate. With that in mind I searched until I found words that worked perfectly with how my mind functions. I needed to find new words to keep my motivation going and to feel better about myself. So the words I came up with and use are- Challenged and coping mechanisms.
Challenged replaces disabled. A challenge is something that you can find a way to meet. Also you can measure success within a challenge and every victory is worth celebrating. You can find the strength to take on a challenge. That to me is a very positive message. So this is a word that I use often to talk and think of myself.
Coping mechanisms replaces overcoming. Coping mechanisms is a fancy way of talking about the small daily steps that a person uses to make their life easy to live and to succeed within their lives. The nice thing about coping mechanisms is that you can find the special ones that work for you and you can learn then from just about anywhere. That is part of the reason I am writing this. With coping you can do anything; there is no limit. Which is very uplifting to say the lest.
So I was going to add the bad about terms here, but this is a long, long post. So I will have to write about that next time.
So until next time!
Tool #2- Find words that make you feel good about yourself, about your place in the world, and that are inline with who you are at heart. Everyone has different ideas about themselves and their goals in life. Think on these ideas and find the positive ideas and words that help you be you. I know this sounds hippy-ish, but if you start thinking positive it is amazing where that positive thought can take you. Even if you don't believe me try it for a week or so.
Also I need to place a disclaimer here. So my Disclaimer- these are MY opinions and observations about my dyslexia. No one is perfectly alike, so therefore I believe that not everyone’s dyslexia is perfectly alike either. Also the many tools that I am going to talk about are things and ideas that have helped me in my life. Some of them may help you, and some may not. I am really hoping to start a conversation and to try to help people who are like me.
So, anyhow, to move on- Terms, which is what I said I was going to talk about.
Let’s start with the Ugly- that’s me. Not physically, mind you… In reality I am actually really cute, but that is not the point. The point is I am a little (ok a lot) hostile to the words that are used everyday to describe dyslexia and in turn dyslexics. Really there are just 2 that most people use that I cannot stand.
*Dramatic Pause*And they are- Disability and Overcoming.
The word disability has a super negative connotation and definition- “a physical or mental handicap, especially one that prevents a person from living a full, normal life or from holding a gainful job.” So in other words- out look of life- not so good and may never be good. I feel that this word robs some of my ability to believe in my future and myself. So I try not to use this word and I go out of my way to avoid it when describing myself. I understand that dyslexia can be a disability and does affect people’s lives, but it is not the end of the world and has many positive things about it (more on that later).
So on to the next word- Overcoming. This is, to me, an over used word that most people would deploy in talking about “fixing” or “curing” dyslexia. I am just going to come right out and say it- there is no magic wand that fixes our brains with dyslexia. It is going to be in our brains for all of our lives and it is going to affect us. Some days it will affects us more then others. The word overcoming, to me, sends a message that there is someway to live where dyslexia does not impact everyday life. I have yet to find the magic formula and I doubt I will.
Let’s move on to the good part, or what I call replacing the ugly terms with more positive messaged words. I think that words are really important. They are the main way we communicate. With that in mind I searched until I found words that worked perfectly with how my mind functions. I needed to find new words to keep my motivation going and to feel better about myself. So the words I came up with and use are- Challenged and coping mechanisms.
Challenged replaces disabled. A challenge is something that you can find a way to meet. Also you can measure success within a challenge and every victory is worth celebrating. You can find the strength to take on a challenge. That to me is a very positive message. So this is a word that I use often to talk and think of myself.
Coping mechanisms replaces overcoming. Coping mechanisms is a fancy way of talking about the small daily steps that a person uses to make their life easy to live and to succeed within their lives. The nice thing about coping mechanisms is that you can find the special ones that work for you and you can learn then from just about anywhere. That is part of the reason I am writing this. With coping you can do anything; there is no limit. Which is very uplifting to say the lest.
So I was going to add the bad about terms here, but this is a long, long post. So I will have to write about that next time.
So until next time!
Tool #2- Find words that make you feel good about yourself, about your place in the world, and that are inline with who you are at heart. Everyone has different ideas about themselves and their goals in life. Think on these ideas and find the positive ideas and words that help you be you. I know this sounds hippy-ish, but if you start thinking positive it is amazing where that positive thought can take you. Even if you don't believe me try it for a week or so.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
You're What?!
I am sure that some of you are wondering about the title of my blog- My Marbled Brain. Not a normal picture is it? I was hoping you would ponder the title and read on!
It is an ode to my friends, family, and pet(s) whom I love; but most of all it is how I view my brain. I am sure most of you just went- "UMMM- What?", which is what I want you to do. You see *drum roll please* I am dyslexic and I don't mean like a little bit. I am on the high end of the spectrum with dyslexia.
You are most likely sitting at your computer blinking and thinking something like "Ooo Wow." or "But you're writing."
Why yes, yes I am. Let me explain why. There are a couple of reasons I am writing a blog about dyslexia.
REASON #1- There are studies that say that at least 10-20% of a given population has dyslexia. That is a lot of people. Many of whom feel frustrated with school, work, or just words, which are everywhere in this modern world. So I am here to give hope and encouragement about having dyslexia and taking on the world! I believe that hope is really important in life, and especially in having a learning challenge.
REASON #2- Since being diagnosed with dyslexia in the first grade (more on that later) I have worked with many great teachers to learn coping mechanisms, aka tools, that I use everyday to do most everything, if you don't believe me ask my friends. I believe that this is a better way to teach any students, so I want to share the tools that help me.
REASON #3- I have been doing a lot of research on the Web about dyslexia and have been unable to find another blog about dyslexia from a dyslexic's point of view, or books written by a dyslexic about dyslexia for that matter. I feel that this missing voice needs to be shared, so here I am writing.
So that is a bit about me, my brain, and dyslexia. Feel free to comment!
Also remember if my spelling or grammar is off I am so sorry, but I am trying my best.
Until next time!
Tool #1- Don't fear failure because it makes the success that much sweeter, but to help the odds practice, practice, practice, practice, and practice some more. Like how I just learned to spell "practice" right!
It is an ode to my friends, family, and pet(s) whom I love; but most of all it is how I view my brain. I am sure most of you just went- "UMMM- What?", which is what I want you to do. You see *drum roll please* I am dyslexic and I don't mean like a little bit. I am on the high end of the spectrum with dyslexia.
You are most likely sitting at your computer blinking and thinking something like "Ooo Wow." or "But you're writing."
Why yes, yes I am. Let me explain why. There are a couple of reasons I am writing a blog about dyslexia.
REASON #1- There are studies that say that at least 10-20% of a given population has dyslexia. That is a lot of people. Many of whom feel frustrated with school, work, or just words, which are everywhere in this modern world. So I am here to give hope and encouragement about having dyslexia and taking on the world! I believe that hope is really important in life, and especially in having a learning challenge.
REASON #2- Since being diagnosed with dyslexia in the first grade (more on that later) I have worked with many great teachers to learn coping mechanisms, aka tools, that I use everyday to do most everything, if you don't believe me ask my friends. I believe that this is a better way to teach any students, so I want to share the tools that help me.
REASON #3- I have been doing a lot of research on the Web about dyslexia and have been unable to find another blog about dyslexia from a dyslexic's point of view, or books written by a dyslexic about dyslexia for that matter. I feel that this missing voice needs to be shared, so here I am writing.
So that is a bit about me, my brain, and dyslexia. Feel free to comment!
Also remember if my spelling or grammar is off I am so sorry, but I am trying my best.
Until next time!
Tool #1- Don't fear failure because it makes the success that much sweeter, but to help the odds practice, practice, practice, practice, and practice some more. Like how I just learned to spell "practice" right!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)